Our fears can hold us back from living the life we really want and deserve. I dreamed most of my life of living in a small cabin in a quiet rural area along the water. My dream was complete, down to the last detail.
An early morning walk is a blessing for the whole day. Henry David Thoreau
I would wake each morning and pull my canoe into the water listening to the solitude, refreshed from the water, I would walk through my gardens picking fresh food for breakfast. After I would get ready for work and enter the rat race.
Some how I kept putting it off, and putting it off all out of fear.
You have no power over me. Sarah to Jareth in the movie Labyrinth
Of course in my dream I wasn’t a single mother. But even that didn’t change the dream. My children knew what I longed for and shared in that dream. My youngest asked if he could have chickens and his own kayak, my eldest wanted his own canoe. The boys so caught up in the same dreams began to look for places we could buy, and we even began to design our own plans for a cabin we would build ourselves. But I kept holding back.
The excuses were all ways there. I didn’t want to move the children to a different school, I didn’t want to take them away from their friends. What if we couldn’t build the house ourselves? What if we couldn’t get help when we needed it? What if I lost my income and couldn’t finish or stay there? What if, what if…
Fears will be reinforced by listening to voices of others
When I would share my dream to live along the water, friends would tell me how impractical I was being. To live by the water would mean floods in the spring time. Relative s kept insisting it was too dangerous to have children that close to the water. Everywhere I turned someone, except my boys, found a reason I should never do this. Deb also tried living the American Dream, only to find it didn’t suit her. She ignored the negative opinions and made the decision to leave her job and start living the life she dreamed of living.
I hate to admit how much I still needed acceptance from my family, but I did. I always felt I had to live their dreams for them instead of mine. I had to face this fact when my boys asked me to home school them (a decision which brought the wrath of my family down on me). They repeatedly reminded me that changing schools was not an issue any longer. But still I held back. I now told them that by the time we built the home and got settled they would be ready to move out and begin life on their own.
Suppressing your dreams hurts
Once my boys had in fact moved out, I realized what a bad example I had set for them. On the one hand I supported their dreams and encouraged them to go for what they wanted, yet I never showed them how to do that. How could I tell them not to let their fears stop them when I was doing exactly that?
My situation changed, physically I was no longer able to dream of building my own cabin. But I knew I had to set the example for them, even if it was late.
This time I jumped. I planned and worked to find just the right location. I let go of the dream of home ownership and decided to rent. I told no one what I was going to do, not even my boys, although they were the first people I did tell. I did this for a few reasons. First, I had finally learned my lesson. I wanted to go with my heart, with no voices in my head of nay-sayers. Second, I knew if anyone would support me in following my dream it would be my sons.
I was right, not only did my boys support me in every way as I made my move, when others voiced their criticisms of what I had done, it was my sons who told them I had done what was right for me.
Some people are coming around to accept the way I decided to live, others haven’t, but that’s okay with me. I found my piece of heaven. For years I would search for homes for sale, I no longer do that. Just up the road from me is a small cottage for sale. It’s 500 sq feet and the cutest thing, but I realized it doesn’t hold any interest for me. When you stop looking for that something else, you will know you have finally found home.
I was warmed by the sun, rocked by the winds, and sheltered by the trees as other Indian babes. I was living peacefully when people began to speak bad of me. Now I can eat well, sleep well, and be glad I can go everywhere with a good feeling. Geronimo
What dreams are you holding back on living? Do you want to skydive, move to the country, or live in a loft in the middle of everything? Do you need help in following your dreams? Check out dreaminder, here you can read others dreams for inspiration, and write down your dream to have emailed to you at a later date for a reminder. What ever you dream don’t wait, tomorrow is never guaranteed.